1. I will let go of…

Research titled “Don’t look back in anger!” by Brassen, Gamer, Peters, Gluth, and Bluch (2012) reported in Science magazine shows that minimizing our regrets as we age creates greater contentment and happiness. The research also shows that holding regrets causes us to take more aggressive and risky behaviors in the future. The most healthy and happy people notice mistakes in their lives and then choose to let them go. This written exercise crystallizes that effect and allows them to pass through your mind instead of sizzling your emotions all day.

2. I am grateful for…

Research by Emmons and McCullough (2003) shows if you write down five gratitudes a week you’re measurably happier over a ten week period. Research shows the more specific the better. We know if people write down “family, food, job” or something similarly vague over and over it really doesn’t cause any happiness increase. Our minds don’t relive any specific experience. Try things like: “When Trooper learned to shake a paw”, “The moment I saw Ana bringing me a coffee”, or “How Antonio finally put the toilet seat down,” etc.

3. I will focus on…

The goal of the daily focus is to strip away the endless list of things you could do into a bite-sized list of things you will do. Why? Because if you don’t you will mentally revisit your could-do list all day. And that will cause decision fatigue. See, decision making energy uses a particularly complex part of the brain and we’re wasting energy anytime we’re unfocused. As Florida State Professor of Psychology Roy Baumeister and New York Times journalist John Tierney say in Willpower: Rediscovering The Greatest Human Strength “Decision fatigue helps explain why ordinarily sensible people get angry at colleagues and families, splurge on clothes, buy junk food at the supermarket and can’t resist the dealer’s offer to rust-proof their new car. No matter how rational and high-minded you try to be, you can’t make decision after decision without paying a biological price. It’s different from ordinary physical fatigue— you’re not consciously aware of being tired—but you’re low on mental energy.”

I use the daily focus to write down three small goals I want to achieve (and importantly can achieve) that day. It feels great crossing them off and satisfying to close the day on a high. If I missed one, I can just add it to tomorrow. An example? “Write Chapter 7 for new book, call Erin about PR campaign, and play tennis with Alec.”